Some names will always taste bitter.

Well, my friend Nick was driving us all home in the Audi on the Pike and he was speeding past everyone on the left lane. I had a gut feeling something was gonna happen, and it did. We got pulled over, and when the statie came over to us, he was like “I know this is a German car, but we’re not driving on the autobahn.” I thought that was pretty funny. But he clocked us going 95+ on a 65 zone. I don’t feel bad, ‘bout time he got punished for his shitty driving.

My ribs hurt
sexhaustive:

sexhaustive:

You by me

this has gotten a few more notes since I’ve last seen it

There hasn’t been food in my house for three weeks. This is absolute shit. Looks like I’m going to be buying groceries, too… Goodbye savings.

christyxflower:

We got one more bottle of Jack what the fuck we gonna do with it?