Remember how I said I felt good about myself earlier?
Yeah, well now it’s late and I was looking at some photos of a girl I know who worked hard to look good, and I feel awful about myself. I can’t go to the gym anymore to work out and improve my progress, and I can’t stop pinching all my fat. I just don’t know how to exercise at home without any equipment.
I know people are proud and can see that I’ve lost 8 pounds, but I’m just upset now. I’m never gonna get skinny and toned like I want to be. And I know that by eating right, it’s just going to cause me to develop an eating disorder. I always watch my calories and I just want to eat less and less now, and I know that’s going to be a problem. People already judge me when I ask how many calories are in something, and that just makes me feel worse.
I don’t know. I just want to be thin.
I really want the lyric “Scars will heal but were meant to bleed” tattooed on the bend of my elbow/top of my forearm. I just don’t know where is a good place to get a tattoo around here.